The Empty Soda Can

Today’s question comes from a high-school friend of mine, Erin Solej. She asks: “Jeff, I remember you commenting on the necessity of the electoral college, but I want to understand it better because I don't see how my vote counts with this system. Of course, I will vote, but can you please post your thoughts on this.” This is seriously a great question, Erin. I hear about this all the time—people don’t understand the Electoral College, and since people tend to fear what they don’t understand, a lot of them want to do away with it. On this point, though, I must respectfully disagree. Knowledge brings familiarity, and frankly, the Electoral College isn’t nearly as bad as some of the more outspoken among us make it out to be. So Erin, thank you so much for your question. Per your request, here are my thoughts: Back when our nation was still in diapers and the Constitution was still being written, there arose a big controversy between the states regarding representation. Some s...

So yesterday, as I walked through Walmart, I heard a guy yelling at a crying child, in the toy department. As there didn’t seem to be any physical harm occurring, I kept going, but heard part of the conversation, as best as I can recollect: Man: “Shut up!” (child keeps crying) Man: “Shut up, [name]!” (child keeps crying) Man: “SHUT UP AND STOP CRYING!” (child gets louder) Man, slightly calmer: “Look, please shut up and listen to me.” (child softens, but keeps crying) Man: “Will you listen to me? Stop crying, and listen to me?” (child stops crying) Man: “Look, we’re here to get a toy for [other child]. [Other child] is getting a toy because she did what she was told. You did not do what you were told, right?” (child whimpers) Man: “When Mommy told [other child] to go sit in the corner, she did. That’s why she’s getting a toy.” Um… parenting FAIL?

I’ve been using AppleScript for years now, but I’ve never had the opportunity to become really good at it. I can do a few simple things, but once I get beyond that, I pretty much have to turn to the web. So it was, this morning: my office has two large windows in it, so the ambient light varies quite a bit from day to day and hour to hour. I finally decided that I’m sick and tired of adjusting the brightness on three different displays—not to mention hoping that they’re all exactly the same—on a regular basis. So as usual, I turned to the web. After a few less useful hits, I finally came to an old blog post called “ Change Monitor Brightness Using AppleScript .” It was exactly what I needed, with three exceptions: Since it’s four years old, it hasn’t been updated for Mountain Lion. It isn’t designed to change multiple displays concurrently. It doesn’t include the ability to specify the brightness level, on the fly. Having solved all three of these problems, I post my resu...

One of the weirdest things about Netflix is how my children are able to dredge up old TV shows that are off the air for a reason. Case in point: Hanna-Barbera’s Godzilla . For those who are mercifully unaware of this show, You can check the Wikipedia page , but I’ll give you my summary of the first episode. The show seems to revolve around the crew of a small ship, consisting of the following: a white man, who is, of course, in charge. If his white maleness weren’t enough to tip you off to this fact, his name is—seriously—Captain Majors. a white woman named Quinn, which, given the next character, should be particularly humorous to fans of Sealab 2021 . a black man whose name I didn’t catch, but who is obviously intelligent because he wears glasses. a white boy, probably about ten years old, with roughly the same haircut as Velma Dinkley . a small, flying, green dinosaur named Godzooky, who seems to serve the same purpose as Scrappy-Doo , i.e. comic relief peppered wit...

Back when I was a kid, growing up in New Jersey, there were only two radio stations on any of our radar: Z-100 (WHTZ / 100.3 FM) and Power 95 (WPLJ / 95.5 FM). Between the two, Z-100 was by far the better station (IMHO). Part of that was the fact that they gave away something in the realm of $50,000/week in prizes, including some $30,000 in cash. But the other part of it was their morning show, the original Z Morning Zoo. I understand the Zoo is still running, but it lost something with the departure of its lead deejay, Scott Shannon, who the network transferred to California to start up Pirate Radio (also at 100.3 FM). Sadly, Scott didn’t gel with the west-cost crowd and, after only a year or two, was back in New York. Happily for him, when Z-100 wouldn’t give him his old job back, he went to Power 95, made their morning show #1, and has been doing it, ever since. But I digress. The point of this post is not to give a history of New York City–area pop/rock radio. The point is...

This morning, I got a call that Caller ID brought up as “MCGRAW HILL COM.” The woman was barely intelligible, but began a conversation that went something like this: “Hello, may I speak to [unintelligible] Drake?” “Yes, this is Mr. Drake.” “Hello?” “Yes.” “Is this Mr. Drake?” “Yes, this is Mr. Drake.” “Oh, okay. Hello, Mr. Drake. I am calling to talk to your about your computer, yes?” “Okay.” “Yes, well, I am calling to talk to you about your computer, because as you know, there are lots of threats on the Internet, yes?” “Mm-hmm.” “So what I want is to help you with your computer, yes?” “Okay.” “So now the first thing you are going to need to do is go to your computer, yes?” “Sure. I’m there.” “You are at your computer?” “Yes.” “Okay, Mr. Drake, and now I need you to turn your computer on.” “It’s on.” “It’s on?” “Yes, it’s on.” “Okay. Now, what I need you to do is look at your keyboard.” “Okay?” “Yes, now I need you to look at your keyboar...

I’ve noticed, over the years, that the companies that make my wife’s make-up seem to enjoy repeatedly changing the names of their colors, with no indication of why they have done so, much less what the newly renamed colors used to be called. (In fact, I only assume they even have an identical predecessor; I really have no idea.) I suspect the reason for this is that, with the exception of certain brands ( e.g. Sei Bella), once an item of make-up has been opened, it can’t be returned nor exchanged. By constantly changing the names and colors, they force women to buy dozens more items than they otherwise would, in an oft-vain attempt to continue to look the way they like. Men, on the other hand, have it a bit easier. In our society, it’s pretty much accepted that men—or, at least, the great majority of men—don’t wear make-up. As such, we never have to worry whether last week’s “Smokey Ember” is this week’s “Light Obsidian.” But we do have a handful of hygiene products that we do use, ...